There’s nothing quite so challenging for a parent than to watch their child struggle. Whether it’s problems at school, in sports, or even with interpersonal relationships, as parents, we want solutions. But where are such solutions found?
One of the problems with problems is that they can seem so unclear. And this leads parents to ask themselves lots of questions… Is the problem “real”? Is it just a “phase”? Will it go away on its own? Am I making too much out of nothing? How do I get help when I’m not completely sure what the problem actually is?
For circumstances such as these, the “coach approach” is very effective. Coaching is a proactive process. It is all about the here and now. Coaching offers strategies for identifying issues and specific techniques for overcoming them. This is in stark contrast to therapeutic or counseling-based approaches. Such treatment-centric approaches focus on the past, on the “why” of things. The result is a default emphasis on what’s “wrong” with a person. This means that a child, either consciously or unconsciously, can end up internalizing the idea that something is, in fact, wrong with them.
This becomes a big problem, and quickly. Once a child has decided that something is wrong with them, they no longer feel accountable for solving their problem. The “problem” is now to blame and the problem becomes an excuse. This is not the path to developing strong, resourceful and confident kids.
Mike’s approach to working with kids is in direct opposition to negative treatment models. Instead, he focuses on finding what’s “right” with them so they can build upon that. They do this by learning skills that appropriately address their particular issues in a way best suited for them.